will you notice?

Shadow 5075

I'm not a chef
But I cooked you a meal

I'm not a gardener
But I grew you a flower

I'm not a musician
But I composed you a song

I'm not a photographer
But I took you a photo

I'm not an author
But I wrote you a story

I'm not a poet
But I wrote you this poem

I'm not an optimist
But I think you'll notice me.

cloudy

clouds smaller 2

I like to let my poems speak for themselves, therefore I’m not particularly keen on prefacing them with any sort of context such as this. However, I feel it necessary to break that wall now so that I’m clear on one thing: I’m not depressed. If you’ve read within this space before, you’re aware that I enjoy writing about mental health–particularly my experiences with it.  This is one such occasion. As always, thanks for reading:

A thought is lurking

Inside me

I'm aware of its 

Existence

But I've chosen to 

Ignore it

Not so much ignore

As push it

Beyond other thoughts

Repressing

Defending myself
From its pain

This is unhealthy

I know this

What else shall I do

To forestall?



Away, away please

Go away

Past the clouds into 

Deepest blue

I'm certain we will

Meet again

Until then, away

Away you.

 

eternity

img_2908

What is eternity like?
What does one do forever?
Does one get bored?
Does one do the same thing daily?
Do days even exist anymore?
Do things begin or end?
What would happen to you?
What if you’re not there?
I’m not so sure about eternity.
I’m sure hoping you’re there.

 

 

 

 

 

Highland TER

 

My life in vintage colors
Memories of simpler times
Silver robots; red wagons
Silly neighbors; street parades

A life of unhinged laughter
Amens before the altar
Real Santa’s; make-believe friends
Rabbit-like cars; in-car phones

Within the Heights of Richmond
On a Terrace named Highland
Dreams wake; reality sleeps
The imagined; magic reigns.

(my)our day

Paul & Josh 75%

Havin’ my second party
You came

Cryin’ when she had to leave
Mom shame

Sittin’ with my grandparents
No blame

Openin’ my next present
New game

Quittin’ on the party NO
Dad claimed

Headin’ back here as soon as
Paul named

Eight Fourteen: The Theiss B-Day
Bro frame

 

Happy birthday, bro.
Stop crashing my party.

-j

(shy)light

IMG_1634

I wish I were a skylight; a lamp atop the tallest building in my city; I want to look out from my lookout; I want to be urban; not sub but above urban; apart from you yet a part of your experience; not a subject, but a mere object; individually insignificant, collectively brilliant; just like you, but not like you; I want you to notice me, but not see me; to light your way, while staying out of it; eradicate shadows, yet staying in mine; my facade, faceless; your afterthought, thinking about you; extroverted travel to you 299,792,458 meters per second, from the introverted refuge of my bulb.